THE ANNOYANCE BLESSING

Let’s play a game. I want you to think of something that is really annoying. A few examples are in order. Washing dishes. If only we could eat and get out of clean-up, dinner would be much more pleasurable. Traffic jams. You’ve been stuck for over 45 minutes due to someone else’s carelessness. Finally, taxes. You earned every cent you have—why does the government have to take it away, and take so much!

You probably have your own favorite annoyances. Hang on to them because now we’re going to play the next part of this game. Put a positive spin on each situation that drives you crazy. You may have to wash dishes, but that means you had a meal, and not everyone in this world enjoys such a fundamental need. You may be stuck in traffic, but that implies you actually own, or at least lease, a car. It may mean that you have places to go to. It can also indicate that if you’re late, someone is going to care. Owning property, having a purpose, and being accountable to people, these are all aspects of a full life. And finally taxes—perhaps the most annoying fact of life. If you owe taxes, that means you’re making money. In this economy, don’t bemoan that situation.

So often, our annoyances expose a short-sightedness that we need to   address. The blessings in our lives are abundant, but due to our impatience, or values that may be temporarily askew, we indulge ourselves in our own irascibility which if not irritating to others, certainly diminishes ourselves. By becoming petty, we become small. That’s a shame because every second we live is precious.

So goes one of the curses in today’s parashah, Ki Tavo, which includes the Tokhekha or a list of maladies that will befall the Jewish people should they abandon the ways of God.

In the morning you shall say “If only it were evening!”
and in the evening you shall say, “If only it were morning!”—

because of what your heart shall dread and your eyes shall see.

(Deuteronomy 28:67)

In other words, wherever you are, you will wish you were somewhere else. Your heart and your eyes will be making you crazy. How’s that for a curse!


As soon as we become annoyed, we ought to stop and thank God, because somewhere in the annoyance is a blessing, and in acknowledging the blessing we strengthen ourselves and our humanity.

The Tokhekha always depicts God as punishing humanity for its sins. That’s a classic idea but one that has never resonated with me. I don’t believe in a punishing God and frankly, question why God would even bother. People are so adept at punishing themselves without God’s help. Let’s strive to not be counted among that group.